The Orientation of Species

Perry v. Schwarzenegger: And on the 9th day they tried to Rest

Dear Diary,

Even El Niño couldn't hold me back! The sky train floated through a drizzly dawn and I parted a swath of dark grey with my sherbet coat on the 17th floor. The security usher seated me snugly betwixt two cute gay couples, him in a purple tie, her in bowling shoes, and me in the middle like a Kinsey number three.

In front of me was Gwyneth Paltrow, coughing in a trench coat, and before the bench were the two bald pates of Boies and Cooper, who brought the Judge's first sardonic smile of the day with news of another witness withdrawn. Ted Olson sat at the head of the table sucking a yellow marker, and UC Davis professor Greg Herek (social psychologist) settled in for a full day on the stand. Calista click-clacked across the courtroom in an alluring grey suit and Judge Walker said, "More binders?!" with a sarcastic smile, as last week's stack had grown to a wall.

Herek was asked whether gays could marry. The answer was yes--someone of the opposite sex. And what is "sexual orientation" and do you "choose" it, and it is "harmful" to change it, and is there really a stigma against "fucking dykes"?

Sexual orientation is an "enduring pattern of attraction, behavior, or identity." Now, it's possible to have desire without acting on it, or to behave without identifying, or to identify without sex, but it's commonly a package deal. Just as Savage Love says, women are more bi, or should I say they have "greater responsiveness to situational or environmental influence" or "erotic plasticity" or "limber limbs." Gay men claim no choice in the matter, the plaintiff proclaims herself a born lesbian, and in 1929 20% of the ladies at all-girl's colleges were necking with their best friend.

The sexual orientation of women can be understood in the context of relationships, and hence they are "relational," whereas for men, sexual orientation is more sexual.

[Oh! He's home....to be continued...]

Mmmm...next morning...now where was I? Behind Gwyneth's ponytail, but then she turned to sneeze with Lily Tomlin's face. She was reading a German newspaper, or was it Dutch? Perhaps she was on assignment from Amsterdam, where same-sex prostitution is legal, as is pot, which explains why they're so happy, as opposed to Mormons, who are suffering such sour grapes cuz polygamy is not. How come some sinner with a six pack gets to marry a stud muffin but I can't wed my wife's handmaid? Almighty God, it's not fair! King Solomon had hundreds of concubines!

Anyone who's actually read Leviticus knows that "lying with another man" is about as abominable as eating a BLT or petting a ferret. In fact, the concept of "homosexuality" didn't even exist until the late 19th century. The term made the first DSM in 1952 based on hearsay, and was dropped by 1973. If the APA agrees that gayness is not maladjustment, then why are young people being strong-armed into SOCT [sexual orientation change therapy] for reparation? It's not effective: the task force report shows that "enduring change is uncommon." According to Just the Facts: S.O. and Youth, the inability to change is met as a "personal and moral failure." "Treatment" does harm in the form of depression and anxiety. Have these Christian "therapists" taken the Hippocratic Oath?

Stigma is defined as "undesired differentness." Structural stigma is a shared view of society as to who should be devalued. Stigmatized individuals have less control over their lives and less power. Can there be a debate about whether faggots are stigmatized? One in five gay persons report experiencing violence due to their orientation. But here in Federal Court it was all acceptance, with same-sex hand stroking, arm draping, and shoulder-rubbing. Speaking of which, I literally collided with the plaintiff, Kris Perry, as we walked down the aisle for lunch break. She spoke to me kindly, smiling with dimples. Already her wide open collar look was becoming the lesbian fashion sensation.

All this talk of sex had riled up my companion, who pulled me across the street in the rain and pressed me up against the steel grates of the derelict shop next to the cheap Dim Sum and...

[to be continued...]

Back in court in my vintage ripped bell-bottoms I noticed a blond, handsome pair who could've been on a water polo team. Then I saw their resemblance to the other plaintiff, who was wearing skinny kicky zip-up boots, so much more femmie than my doc martens. But for style, the fusion prize went to a lavandar tie on mint.

Then I was nodding for the next two hours, daydozing during talk of first attractions. There was Judy from Lost in Space [the blond sister in a silver spacesuit], then Suzanne, the lanky insouciant second grader with dark dreamy eyes, then David Cassidy--I think I love your feathered hair!--then Malboro Men, then the Mets. Typically, a sexual identity isn't formed until your mid-20s, when you start to think about settlin' down. Even though 42% of all men have had a same-sex experience, much of it happens before age 18. Which brings up the most popular question to Dan Savage: Does that crazy drunken night make me gay? A useful determinant is "enduring patterns of affection" and "current erotic thoughts and feelings."

[tbc....]